As you may have read in my previous post, I have fallen on hard times. This has forced me to look for work out of state.

I figured that the with California releasing 40,000 prisoners, surely I could find some freelance work there. So, I loaded up the Plastimobile and I moved to Beverly..Hills, that is. Well, OK, not Beverly Hills, but to a seedy motel off the Sunset Strip. I wanted to be near the action.

But first, I decided to do a little sightseeing. I went to Koreatown, where I saw some very offensive billboards. After that, I realized I had left all of my crimefighting gear back at the Plasticave, so I went to buy some more

at Mr. Stuff. They were out of capes, though, so I was back to Hollywood Boulevard for that.

Finally, I drove over to get some souvenirs for the Plastigirl and the kids at the L.A. Coroner's Office Gift Shop. I spent so much money there, I couldn't afford another night at the motel, so I had to drive straight back to the Plasticave. Oh well, I'm sure the Governator can take care of crime in the Golden State.

Despite all the efforts of the leaders of this great state to attract business, it appears that the beaver state only has the fourteenth best business climate in the country. Apparently, corporate business taxes are far too high. Can you imagine? What to do when businesses pay at least ten dollars a year in taxes? Sprint, Macys and Eli Lilly will surely flee the state if they have to pay more!

This recession has hit all of us hard. My life, as a solitary crimefighter, has been especially difficult. You see, I spend my days monitoring the ground situation and many sleepless nights trolling the streets for the dregs of society so you don't have to. But even drug dealers have fallen upon hard times. Without narcotrafficking, crime goes down and I'm out of a job.

So I may have to turn to product placement on this blog. Perhaps some Google AdWords. Whatever I can to turn a buck.

I've already been approached by a few manufacturers to do product endorsements. I would appreciate some feedback, dear reader, before signing a contract. I know some are a little scatological. But, would you buy any of these products?

• Are you a parolee coming in to do a urine test? Nervous? Toked up a few days ago? Relax, because you're urinating into Petey P. Cup. He's warm and soothing. You can even be his fan on Facebook!
  

• Don't be a scofflaw the next time you take Fido out for a walk! Use the Pootrap and you'll never be caught unprepared.
  

• Cheney and Bush may have allowed waterboarding, but when the plasticgraduate questions subjects he never resorts to "enhanced interrogation techniques." If you enjoyed Gitmo and Abu Ghraib, you'll love our torture trading cards! Collect them all.
  

Regular readers of plasticgraduate.com may notice some older posts being 'reposted.' They had been inadvertently taken down when the domain was changed and over the next few days may be appearing. Please excuse any problems this may cause in your RSS feed.

Excuse the political edge of this post. If you are a liberal you may wish to skip this commentary:

Faithful readers:

Though the plasticgraduate is a law & order kind of guy who believes that natural resources are for the strong and powerful to use as they please, he has friends from across the political spectrum.

Some of these friends also fight for justice, even if it for something as silly as the well-being of the developing world. Screw 'em, I say.

Nevertheless, we take a moment to welcome frequent commenter, Hari Batti, to the blogosphere with his Green Light Dhaba. Hari fights for environmental & social justice on the Indian subcontinent. See what the daily special is.

I recently stepped away from the computer to get a quick snack and take a bathroom break. When I got back to my workstation, I had received a pop-up on one of the many monitors I have alerting me about how to deal with my internet addiction.

Of course, the plasticgraduate really has no such problem. While there are 87 million Americans who are stuck on the Facebook for hours and hours,  I much prefer the old fashioned string and tin cans. Since the Bush administration, though, illegal wire tapping and string tapping have been rampant. One can never be too careful, which is why I'm considering canceling my string service and Comcast and sending all of my data via carrier pigeon. That way my data should be safe from the authorites, unless the pigeon is suspected of terrorism. In which case I will have to hand deliver this blog to your door.

While, I am the plasticgraduate, not the grammar girl, no - that is not a typo.

The moon is in the seventh house and Jupiter is aligned with Mars. Yesterday was 9/9/9. The plasticgraduate does not believe in numerology and there is a conspiracy to keep the truth about this date from the public.

While mainstream media outlets pique our interest, but ultimately insist that there is nothing special about the day, the blogosphere has sought to focus on one of the more pernicious problems which has infested the Internet since its inception: cats, many of them feral, many of them not.

You may have noticed relatively few cats on the internet yesterday. The folks at Urlesque declared it was a day without cats. The fourth estate immediately jumped on the bandwagon. Time, NPR, and many, many blogs did the same - drawing our collective attention away from the momentous occasion of 9/9/9. And when a gathering was to take place as the clock struck 9:09:09 that celestial evening, representative Joe Wilson yelled "liar" in the middle of President Obama's Speech on Healthcare.

His chief of staff has issued a press release stating that Mr. Wilson was not referring to the President, he was yelling at his neighbor who claimed that cats can't really play piano.

My wish: 10/10/10 - a day without Comcast.

Fact: 57% of all Oregonians were born in a state other than Oregon.*

Fact: 28% of all Oregonians believe themselves to be "environmentally aware."*

Fact: All Oregonians own a pair of Khakis and a Kleen Kanteen.*

(*I was actually too lazy to look up any of this and made it all up.)

You may think that this is the most boring blog, but you would be wrong.

Many of you have speculated on the exact location of the Plasticave, from which, lonejustice is written. Well, I assure you that it is not in Boring. The Plasticave is a secure hideaway, and yours truly, the plasticgraduate, accesses lonejustice, through a series of tubes called the Internet. This is truly amazing technology that allows for complete anonymity.

The plasticgraduate has always been a great believer in the superiority of the animal kingdom. Obviously, monkeys have known for years how to peel a banana while I always struggle, mashing it and throwing away half. Oh well, I usually have enough left over for my Cheerios. What do monkeys care about cereal? They probably take Lipitor for their cholesterol problems.