Excuse the political edge of this post. If you are a liberal you may wish to skip this commentary:

The leftist crazies in this country want the government to take over healthcare. It's downright frightening to step outside the plasticave.

As a crimefighter, I have to keep myself in peak physical condition, after all, how can I be expected to chase down bad guys on my bum knee? If I am forced to eat sprouts and run six miles a day, why should I pay insurance premiums for people who eat Kraft dinners and get cancer?

We should not depend upon the largess of the oppressive government to take care of us. It is up to the individual. We must get rid of programs that ultimately harm people by making them dependent on the government. Let's get those stinkin', lazy kids off welfare and put them to work!

You like the library? It's part of a bloated government. If you like to read, buy your own books like they do in Philadelphia. (Update: it appears that the socialist prevailed in the City of Brotherly Love).

I personally would prefer a complete disbanding of the police department. By privatizing the police, I could pick up some more freelance hours. If you can't afford protection, well, boo hoo. Too bad for your bleeding, liberal heart.

We're making inroads with the army. Smaller is better. We can avoid the draft and hire private contractors!

Finally, nobody has a 'right' to a free education. My grandfather left school at age nine to work on the farm and he became successful by sweat and hard work.

We must stop socialism now. If healthcare in Cuba is so good, why is Fidel Castro sick? Our healthcare system is the best in the world! Well, at least it would make the top forty!