Wish I were a Twitterati

I've been down on Twitter, lately.

I thought Twitter had potential to be a tool for good. The governor could beam me an @reply into the cold, stormy, Oregon sky, calling me when the state was in trouble. A damsel in distress could DM me and I would come running. My legions of fans would RT my tweets. The twitterati would bit.ly my URL's.

Alas, it has not come to pass. Forty percent of tweets are, in fact, pure drivel.

Most people don't even tweet more than a once - ever. The good news is, if you were hoodwinked into following some of these losers - as I have been, you can use unTweeps.com to find out who they are and unfollow them.

@APlusK, AKA Ashton Kutcher, is approaching four million followers. His wifey, @mrskutcher, is forever ensconced in our collectively tweeted memory in her bikini.

Fame and fortune can come to us lesser folk, too. @shitmydadsays just inked a TV deal.

No TV deal for @plasticgraduate. I'm still trying to get up to 80 followers including pornbots.

My lowly status as the 515,914th twitterer is only slightly ameliorated by my Number One status here at the Plasticave. Luckily, Plastigirl isn't tweeting, yet.

Back to toiling in obscurity...


3 comments to "Wish I were a Twitterati"

  • Do you really wish you were a Twitterati? Because you so kindly provided the link, I scanned Demi's and Asshat's Twitter pages, and they have nothing interesting to say. Oooh, her hubby (one of the most vile words in the English language) got her a new Prius. Ooooh, she's getting into her birthday suit and snuggling with her hubby. Ooooh... boring! I'm amazed that almost 4 million people are that interested in what he's posting. A whole lotta nothin'.

    Soon, Twitterville will extinguish...

  • Aleksandra makes a good point. I've been trying to figure out how to use twitter and have found that it is rarely helpful. But not never helpful.

    I wouldn't use it as a hotline, however!

  • If Plastigirl does not twitt is because she is busy... at the end somebody has to do the job that Plastigraduate does not do when he is busy twittering...

About this blog


  • Politics.

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A masked vigilante, the plasticgraduate is a 21st century crimefighter for truth and justice.

He writes from an undisclosed location in the great state of Oregon. There, he wages a lone battle in a world where the natives are bent on the destruction of humanity.

When not eliminating scum from the earth, he lives peacefully with his family in the Plasticave.

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