Would Monkeys Prefer Windows or Apple?

The plasticgraduate has always been a great believer in the superiority of the animal kingdom. Obviously, monkeys have known for years how to peel a banana while I always struggle, mashing it and throwing away half. Oh well, I usually have enough left over for my Cheerios. What do monkeys care about cereal? They probably take Lipitor for their cholesterol problems.

So monkeys are clearly intelligent creatures, so closely related to homo sapiens they could be our uncles. But I never understood how you could place one in front of a typewriter and he would eventually knock out the great works of Shakespeare. I didn't think monkeys even liked Shakespeare. What if it were a French monkey? Would he write Victor Hugo instead?

Apparently some guy in England actually tested out this theory. After five years, all he could get out of the monkey was the word, "monkey." Not even, "monkey want banana."

So, I heard that this Internet thing is a little like the infinite monkey theory. Except that it's proved the theory wrong.


3 comments to "Would Monkeys Prefer Windows or Apple?"

  • Have you heard of the 101 monkey theory. Monkeys using discrete skills they stumble upon individually, like washing a banana in the river to get the sand off it, will transfer this skill to the whole community of monkeys if a certain critical m,ass of monkeys engage in the skill. On reaching the critical number, say a hundred, the rest of the ten thousand monkeys will acquire the skill overnight.

    Each one teach one.

    Not sure if there is anything scientific about this theory, but I like the idea.

    Just think if your monkey manages to type monkey and teaches another, and another, pretty soon they will all be typing monkey, followed by the typing of ransom notes, hold up notes, Les miserable and Shakespeare.

  • Plastic Guy,

    This is brilliant. What I want to know is how many of the universe's infinite blogs are typed by monkeys?

  • Mickey & mridula:
    Fascinating theories. I think when taken together we can safely assume that the proliferation of blogs on the web (lonejustice, being an exception, of coursea) is the result a mashup of your two concepts.

    After the hundred and one monkeys learned how to write a blog, a million others learned the next evening. Amazing. Now we've (ahem, I mean they've) all learned how to use facebook.

About this blog


  • Politics.

  • Internet.

  • Technology.


A masked vigilante, the Plasticgraduate is a 21st century crimefighter for truth and justice.

He writes from an undisclosed location in the great state of Oregon. There, he wages a lone battle in a world where the natives are bent on the destruction of humanity.

When not eliminating scum from the Earth, he lives peacefully with his family in the Plasticave.

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